Always count your blessings

Happy Independence Day.

It is very early in the morning, and I have a lot on my mind. Dylan has another friend whose father is dying of cancer, and was told he had just one more week. I'm not sure how this is affecting Dylan. He has been much more contemplative about life and death lately. I suppose it is a normal response, and I am very thankful that he will at least instigate conversations about it. He still does those very normal teenage things that can really grate on me, and when he crosses the line I bite his head off. But I'm pretty sure we are normal and good.

One of my supervisors had a tragic day. His foster son, who he has cared for since the boy was three days old, was run over and killed while the family was picnicking at the local lake. Just horrible. They were in the process of adopting the toddler. It is just so very sad. I was a bit surprised by some reactions to this story. A few people expressed anger over someone not properly watching the child. I am intrigued by how people deal with uncomfortable news. Some people actually have to blame someone in order to make sense of it all. Anyone who is a parent knows that these things can happen in the blink of an eye, and you don't have to be particularly neglectful! Sometimes, it really is just the wrong place at the wrong time, but the results are so final and so irreversible that we can't comprehend it.

My mom's uncle is in his final days of fighting lung cancer. I was amazed to hear that the family was still pursuing chemo treatments, and I hate to sound coldhearted and callous, but he has so many other health issues on top of the cancer that it seems futile and cruel to me. But how can you tell someone to stop hoping and just let go?

So death looms around us. I guess it always does, but it is much more noticeable right now. I actually spent time last week making a list of who should be a pallbearer for my casket when I die. Later, I remembered that I want to be cremated, so it is moot. I can be so morbid, but I also want to be involved in how I am remembered.

John and I met for lunch today. The tile place was the original rendezvous point, but they were closed. Bummer. I told him how scared I am to realize that our kids are growing up so fast, and this parenting of the young phase of our lives will be over sooner than we realize.

Our construction project is coming along swimmingly. Now it gets to the hard part - - choosing paint, tile, etc. The stuff we have to surround ourselves with.

Okay, I'd better get some sleep. In just a few hours, it will be time to let freedom ring!

I love July 4th. I love being an American. God bless America.

~L